


State of Being

by Mercy_Rhyne



Series: State of Mind [2]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Compilation of one shots and whatnot, Don't know what all of this will be yet, M/M, Other, State of Mind universe
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-14
Updated: 2018-11-13
Packaged: 2019-08-23 06:53:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,667
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16614038
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mercy_Rhyne/pseuds/Mercy_Rhyne
Summary: This is going to be a compilation of one shots and 'deleted scenes' for my State of Mind fic, all set in the State of Mind universe :D





	State of Being

**Author's Note:**

> Credit for this particular idea goes to Vic, thank you so much <3
> 
> Summary: An AU where the roles are reversed; Virgil is a UC while Roman is an LMC. I might continue this at some point cause I liked writing this haha

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A State of Mind AU where the roles are reversed. Virgil is a UC, while Roman is the LMC.

Roman snuck a glance at the guy who just entered the café. He was a regular here, and Roman was… quite gay for him. It was hard to _not_ guy fall for the guy. With his hair dyed in different colours – it was black and blue for now – and his punk way of dressing, combined with his love for dark make-up… he was absolutely gorgeous. That was the only way to describe him. Absolutely, drop-dead gorgeous.

What Roman loved so much about this guy, was that, even if he looked like the guy who would kill you for just looking at him, he was an absolute sweetheart, really. The two sometimes made a little small talk if he was waiting for his order, and the café wasn’t too busy. Just small talk, of course. Nothing too personal. And this dude – Virgil, if the name he gave Roman was correct – was amazingly sweet and down to earth. He had the calmest voice, and his laugh…

Yeah, Roman was totally gay for him.

Even if it was clear that Virgil was in one of the higher classes, there was no harm in dreaming. And Roman happened to be a big dreamer. He couldn’t help but think about him and Virgil. Maybe it was weird, to have that kind of daydreams about a customer, someone he barely knew, someone who was obviously in a higher class than he was. But this man… he was so sweet, so gorgeous, so amazing. Roman couldn’t stop himself.

Roman already dreamed a lot. It was what got him through most of his life. Because his life wasn’t particularly great. Sure, he had a house, he could afford food, technically, but… that was about it. He could afford the minimum and not much more. He liked to thing that dreaming was what kept him sane. It was something to distract himself, at least. Reality hurt after those daydreams, but that was only temporary. He was at peace with most of this. He didn’t _like_ it, he didn’t think it was _fair_ , but he was powerless to make a change, and he had accepted this, even if it hurt. He could always dream.

And these dreams were what pushed him to just _try_ it. Just _try_ to ask Virgil out. He knew that their relationship would have to be kept a secret, but he just wanted to try. Even if Virgil would refuse, even if he would turn him in to the State for attempting to get into more intimate contact with him. Even if he would die. He knew he’d regret it if he didn’t try it.

So, one day, when Virgil entered the café, ordering his usual drink, Roman took his chance. When he knew he was out of sight of the cameras, Roman wrote a small message on the inside of the cardboard strip around the cup. He didn’t know if it would work, but Roman did know that Virgil would often sit down in the café with his drink, making a few sketches in his notebook as he finished his drink. More often than not, the cardboard strip would slip down, so… at the right angle… it could work. And maybe Virgil would see it. And maybe he wouldn’t judge Roman for it.

As briefly as he could, Roman wrote down a short message:

_Hey… wanna meet tomorrow near the forest? 8 PM? Just come… or don’t, that’s fine :)_

After making sure it wasn’t too noticeable for the cameras, Roman finished making the drink. He walked to the counter and called out Virgil’s name.

The other guy got up, leaving his notebook at his usual window seat and took his drink with a smile. As he thanked Roman for the drink, their fingers brushed for a second. Roman could’ve sworn his heart stopped. He bit his lip, trying to hide the growing smile.

Virgil smiled back at him before he turned back to his seat. Roman couldn’t help but watch him as he walked away. God, this man was absolutely _gorgeous_. He was so gay for this guy.

 

The café wasn’t too busy, so Roman sat down behind the counter, waiting for something to do. Meanwhile, he shot Virgil an occasional glance. The man was drawing something, occasionally sipping his drink. Roman couldn’t see what he was making, but he was extremely focussed on the task before him.

After a bit, the cardboard strip slipped off and lay on the table as Virgil picked up his cup. When he went to put it back, his eyes fell on the inside of the strip, for just a second. Then, he looked away and Roman quickly looked down, focussing on his nails instead. When he felt it would be safe to look up, he just caught Virgil turning his head away.

And he couldn’t help but wonder…

Had Virgil seen his message?

 

The next day consisted of… anxiety, mostly. Roman couldn’t stop thinking about Virgil. Would he come? Had he taken the message to the police to have him arrested? What would happen? Roman was starting to regret his decision, but he kept telling himself that he _wanted_ this. If this would be his dead… at least he wouldn’t die wondering what would have happened if he had asked Virgil out.

But even with that in mind… it seemed so stupid to him. Virgil was a UC – that’s what he thought at least, he looked like he could be one. Why would someone like _him_ go out with Roman? He probably already had someone anyways. Or he wasn’t attracted to guys. There were so many things against them. Why had Roman even thought about asking this guy out? Surely, he would dismiss it. He would have thrown it away as soon as he left the café, not even thinking about taking up the offer. If he would even be that merciful. Countless of scenarios haunted his mind, and for once, Roman hated his creative mind.

 

Roman arrived at the forest ten minutes early. He just didn’t want to be late. He wanted to be there first, for if Virgil _did_ decide to show up.

He paced around nervously, _hugely_ regretting his decision by now, as the butterflies in his stomach reached a peak. While Roman was always the optimistic guy, the one who never let go of his dreams, he now realised that his decision had probably been the worst one yet. Virgil was so much better than him, why on Earth would he settle for an LMC like himself? Stupid romantic nature. He should have thought this true. God, how Roman hated himself in this moment.

In the distance, he saw someone approaching, and he froze. Oh God. This was it. He could still turn back, but… he wouldn’t. If this was Virgil, he couldn’t just stand him up. The sun had already set about an hour ago, so all Roman could really see, was a silhouette of a man.

But, when the silhouette came closer, Roman recognized the contrast of black hair on pale skin, and black lips he would recognize anywhere – he wasn’t a stalker, really. Black lipstick was just pretty uncommon. That was all. Really.

“Hey,” Roman breathed, smiling at the man in front of him. “You came.”

“Yeah,” Virgil nodded, rubbing his neck with an adorable smile. “Well, I… I couldn’t refuse that offer.”

“I was freaking out so much,” the LMC admitted with a scoff. “You don’t even know.”

“Oh, I can imagine,” the artist mumbled, biting his lip. “Anyways… glad to see it’s not a trap. I hope.”

Roman chuckled and nodded, hugging himself. “Yeah, I’m glad you haven’t gotten me arrested yet.”

Virgil laughed softly, Roman’s heart going haywire at the sound of it. It sounded so melodious and… he was so gay.

Roman shivered as the wind blew past him. He didn’t have the money to buy a proper coat, so all he had, was a second-hand, low-quality, fake leather jacket. It was a faded red. Not exactly the prettiest, but it was something.

Virgil noticed the other man shivering and looked at him. “Aren’t you freezing?” he asked, frowning worriedly as he eyed Roman’s jacket.

Despite actually being cold, Roman shook his head. “No, no I’m fine,” he assured the other. “I’m used to this anyways.”

But, ignoring his response, Virgil already took off his black coat, handing it to the other. “Here, take this.”

“Y- you don’t have to…” Roman shook his head again, gently pushing Virgil’s hand away. “You need it.”

“But you need it more,” the younger man insisted. “I’m fine, I’ve got a pretty good hoodie, don’t worry about it.”

Roman bit his lip as he looked at the coat. He couldn’t take it, but on the other hand… where was the harm in taking the offer just this once? No one would know anyways.

“Fine,” he groaned as he took the black coat. “Thank you.”

Virgil smiled at the other put on the coat. It was just a tiny bit small, as Virgil was a bit smaller too, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. Most importantly, it was Virgil’s. And it was warm.

“I’m pretty sure this is the warmest I’ve ever been,” Roman grinned as he zipped the coat up. “But are you sure you won’t get cold?”

He looked at the other man, afraid he would be burdening him by claiming his coat. Yes, Virgil had offered him the coat in the first place, but that did not mean Roman didn’t doubt this. He really didn’t want Virgil to be cold either. Quite honestly, he’d rather be cold himself than have Virgil be cold. He was used to the cold, anyways.

“No, not at all! I’m fine, really… I don’t know your name.” He chuckled softly, hugging himself. “I’m an idiot, I didn’t even properly introduce myself, I’m sorry. Virgil Casey.”

Roman smiled at Virgil and shook his outstretched hand. “Roman Lufé,” he responded. “It’s great to meet you.”

**Author's Note:**

> This is just a little thing to celebrate the anniversary of State of Mind, updates will come and go :)


End file.
